Pregnancy marks the start of an exciting new chapter in your life. You can’t wait to meet your baby and become a mother. But at the same time, pregnancy can also bring lots of worries. It’s perfectly normal to have lots of questions after you find out that you’re pregnant.
However, sometimes these uncertainties can give way to full-blown anxiety. This is especially true if you’ve always had perfectionist tendencies!
Of course, you’ll want to take good care of yourself and your baby during this time. Yet this does not mean that you have to suffer from perfectionism and anxiety for months on end. Here are a few ways that perfectionism can affect your pregnancy.
Strict Birth Plan
You’ll go over your birth plan with your doctor well before your due date. You may have a very specific idea of how you want your labor and delivery experience to go. Of course, you have every right to tell your doctor your preferences, and they should do their best to treat you in accordance with your wishes.
But even the best laid birth plans can go awry. Often, doctors have to deviate from birth plans in order to protect the health of both the mother and baby. There is no need to blame yourself if your birth plan needs to be changed.
Fear of Making Mistakes
If you’re a perfectionist, you might be nervous about making mistakes all of the time. But this can be especially true during pregnancy. You may worry about every choice you make and question whether or not you could be unknowingly hurting yourself or your baby. With each passing day, you find new decisions to question.
Constantly Looking Up Symptoms
You can’t help yourself - you are constantly finding new symptoms to look up. Every time you search for a new symptom or problem, you add to your long list of worries. Your stress levels are at an all time high.
Even when your doctor says that everything seems fine, you wonder whether or not they’re actually right. You feel like if something even seems slightly “off,” it might be your fault—and now, it’s your responsibility to fix it. Each symptom can become a cause for concern, even if it’s technically normal.
Comparisons to Other Women
You frequently compare your pregnancy experience with your friends. Each time they mention how they’re feeling, you wonder if you’re “measuring up,” or if they’re doing something beneficial that you’re not. Or perhaps you don’t know anyone else who is pregnant at the moment.
Despite this, you look up other pregnant influencers on social media, or even watch videos about celebrity pregnancies. You might compare your symptoms, your appearances, or other details. Maybe it seems like everyone else’s pregnancies are going better than yours, and you wonder why you’re not having the same experiences as other women you know.
Worrying About Your Baby
Finally, your perfectionist tendencies can extend to worrying about your baby. You feel like their health and wellbeing is ultimately out of your control. A perfectionist mindset can fuel your fears and anxiety. When you talk to women in your life who have had babies recently, you can’t stop thinking about whether or not you’ll have an “easy” baby or a “difficult” baby.
Realistically, your own actions will not determine this, but you also start to wonder if something you might be doing right now could somehow affect this outcome.
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Are you struggling with perfectionism during your pregnancy? Working with a therapist can help you find peace of mind. Reach out to us to discuss scheduling your first session for women’s counseling.