Every toddler has tantrums. It’s perfectly normal behavior. Yet for parents, every meltdown can be more frustrating than the last. On an intellectual level, you know that your child is just trying to expire their feelings in the only way they know. But even if you understand that it’s not your child’s fault, you still wish it wasn’t happening.
Plus, there’s nothing more overwhelming than those instances when your child has a meltdown in public. Deep down, you know that every parent has been there, too. Yet when it’s your turn, you might feel embarrassed or ashamed. There are a few things you can do to keep your cool during toddler tantrums. Here are some realistic tips!
Accept That It’s Happening
Accepting that your toddler is having a tantrum might seem like the last thing you want to do. But in a sense, this makes it easier to deal with the situation. Rather than fighting against the moment and focusing on how you wish your toddler would act, you have to address their behavior as it is.
When you surrender to the situation, you’ll probably still feel annoyed at the circumstances. But this state of mind can better serve you. Much of parenthood, especially in the early years, is about surrendering to the circumstances at hand and dealing with challenges as they arise, rather than planning for everything to go smoothly.
Step Away From the Situation Together
Sometimes, you will not be able to exit a particular situation or space just because your toddler is having a tantrum. But if possible, it can be helpful to simply remove yourselves from the situation, at least momentarily. This is especially true if you suspect that your toddler is having a tantrum because they are overstimulated by their surrounding.
For example, if you’re at the grocery store and your toddler starts throwing a tantrum, you may want to step outside the store for at least a few minutes to give them a chance to calm down.
Don’t Try To Talk Over Your Toddler
As a parent, it’s only natural to feel like you need to take advantage of teaching moments. But the midst of a tantrum is not an opportune time for passing on life lessons or trying to impart good behavior skills. Instead, save these talks for after the tantrum has subsided. Even trying to talk over your toddler can quickly turn into a yelling match. This only heightens both of your emotions.
Walk Away for a Few Minutes
Are you at home with your child? Sometimes, it’s okay to walk away for a few minutes if your child is in their room. Yes, they might make a mess with their toys when you step away. But having to tidy up later is a small price to pay for a moment of solitude when your child is in the middle of a tantrum.
You have the right to step away if necessary, as long as you know that your child is safe. Doing so can help you return to the situation with a calmer mindset.
Be Kind, Yet Firm
When your child has calmed down, you may be able to talk to them about what upset them or how to handle their emotions. Of course, it’s important to keep these talks age-appropriate, and move forward with the understanding that tantrums will happen again in the future. You can be kind and compassionate, yet firm with your toddler.
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Are you having trouble dealing with toddler tantrums? Talking to a therapist can help. Reach out to us today to discuss your options for scheduling your first session for learning to manage your stress when it comes to tantrums with anxiety therapy or parent counseling.