When your child is having a meltdown, it’s difficult to stay calm. The moment their crying picks up, you can tell whether this is going to turn into a full-on tantrum. You spring into action, wanting to calm your child down as soon as possible. Sometimes, you’re able to soothe them quickly.
But at other times, your child gets upset at the most inconvenient times, or in very public places, and you feel like you’re being pushed to the brink. You can barely stop yourself from yelling at them.
When your child is in the midst of a meltdown or tantrum, it’s hard to hold yourself back from getting angry, too. It’s completely normal for parents to feel this way. Here are a few tips you can keep in mind the next time your child has a meltdown.
Use Distractions
It’s perfectly fine to distract your child sometimes when they are on the verge of a tantrum. After all, in some situations, it’s all that you can do. This is especially true if you’re not able to spend a lot of time solely focused on soothing your child.
You may be in public or in a social situation that you cannot easily leave. It’s okay to hand your child a toy, or try to shift their attention to something else. It’s not “cheating.” In fact, giving your child a positive distraction to take their attention away from something silly is a perfectly healthy way to address a tantrum, as long as nothing is seriously wrong.
Step Away for a Moment
If you are at home, and your child is throwing a tantrum, it is sometimes okay to step away for a few minutes. Of course, it’s important to take a moment to ensure that your child is safe. If they are in their own room, and you know that they are not going to hurt themselves, you can step away and close the door.
You do not always have to hover around your child when they have a tantrum. Sometimes, if your child has been overstimulated, they might actually benefit from having a few minutes to themselves. You might be surprised by how quickly they can self-soothe.
Get to a Quiet Location
What if you’re in a noisy public place, and you feel completely overwhelmed when your child starts throwing a tantrum? It never hurts to have an exit strategy, even if you’re just stepping out temporarily.
If you’re out grocery shopping, you may want to head outside to your car for a few minutes. Even if you’re at a social gathering, see if you can bring your child into another room for a breather.
Allow Your Child to be Disappointed
At times, it’s hard to stay calm because you feel so much pressure to ensure that your child isn’t disappointed. But parents can’t satisfy their child’s every wish. Learning to live with disappointment is just a part of life, and it’s a lesson that every child will need to get comfortable with sooner or later.
If your child is upset about something that is ultimately inconsequential, reminding yourself that they will survive disappointment can help you stay calm.
Give Yourself Grace
What if you do slip up and raise your voice when your child is having a meltdown? It does not make you a bad parent. All parents face these struggles, and making up with your child afterward can be the best course of action.
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Are you struggling to stay calm during child meltdowns? A therapist can give you the support you need. Reach out to us to learn more about women’s therapy services.