Parenting Hack: Ask Your Kids for an Evaluation of Your Parenting Style

As a parent, you want to ensure that your children are happy and healthy. With every choice you make, you’re hoping to set them up for a fulfilling and stable adult life. But sometimes, you can’t help but question your parenting style, the rules you set for your household, and the big decisions you’ve made regarding your children.

You might spend lots of time wondering whether or not you’re doing the right thing. Yet you don’t always feel comfortable opening up to your loved ones about these concerns.

However, there’s another solution for getting to the bottom of this problem. You can ask your children how they feel about your parenting style. Yes, sometimes going straight to the source for insight is the best way to get the feedback you really need!

Here’s why it might be worth asking your child for their opinion on your parenting style.

Why Ask Your Children?

Ultimately, your children’s thoughts about your parenting style matter more than almost anyone else’s, with the possible exception of your partner. It’s all too easy to get caught up in seeking approval from your friends, your own parents, your extended family, or society as a whole.

But at the end of the day, your children’s wellbeing and happiness matters far more than anyone else’s perspective on your parenting style.

Letting Go of  “Guessing Games”

Do you ever catch yourself wondering what your children really think about your parenting style? By asking them in a straightforward manner, you can stop playing guessing games. You don’t have to stay in the dark about your children’s feelings. Instead, you can simply ask them directly.

Soothe Your Insecurities

Maybe you’re worried that your children are unhappy about certain rules that you have them follow, or other aspects of your parenting style. By talking to your child about their feelings, you can stop ruminating on these insecurities. Instead, you can just find out how they feel. You don’t have to keep yourself up at night wondering if they’re truly happy.

Part of you might be nervous to ask your child for their honest opinion. But hearing what they say in response can be freeing. You might realize that some of the things you were so worried about aren’t concerns for your children after all!

Establish Honest Communication

As your child grows up, it’s only natural that they’ll want to form their own identity. They’ll want more privacy, too. But if you solicit their honest opinions about important topics from a young age, they’ll realize that you genuinely want to hear their perspectives.

When your child knows that their thoughts and feelings matter to you, they might be more likely to open up with their own questions in the future. Asking your children about their feelings on your parenting style can make it easier to talk about tough topics later in life.

Allow Space for Compromise

Finally, asking your children for their thoughts on your parenting style opens up space for compromise. This does not mean that you have to loosen up every rule you’ve ever set if your children express disagreements with you.

However, it does mean that you can take a second look at your guiding principles for parenting and reevaluate them. When you show your children that you’re willing to compromise for the sake of their health and happiness, they will see that you value their wellbeing. This can strengthen your relationship and deepen your bond.

Are you trying to reevaluate your parenting style? Working with a therapist can help. Reach out to us to discuss your options for scheduling your first session in parent therapy.